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Anyone who uses social media has been somewhat limited by the nature of engagement.

But whereas Facebook at least requires somewhat of a sense of transparency and accountability, apps like Grindr allow the user to operate under the guise of anonymity.

She writes, “If you’re a gay man, phrases like ‘no blacks’ and ‘no Asians’ aren’t just words that you’d find on old signs in a civil rights museum, they are an unavoidable and current feature of your online dating experience.

On gay dating apps like Grindr and Scruff, some men post blunt and often offensive disclaimers on their profiles such as ‘no oldies,’ ‘no fems,’ and ‘no fatties.’” Naturally, the crude and rudimentary nature of “Grindr speech” is the type of language that most people would not use in face-to-face communication.

In other words, Grindr, Scruff and the rest of the lot are creating a bunch of gay sex robots who only know how to communicate with each other via pictures and sexual function.He responded with ‘you're disgusting.’ I replied he was ignorant for his age.Then he started calling me a liar and a dirty slut. They reviewed our conversation and deleted his profile. I feel kinda insecure and a little afraid now to meet new guys.” These are but a few ways in which users of these apps can experience harmful engagements from other users.The profile for Guy #1 may go something like this: I am an athletic jock looking for fun. You must practice ballet beneath the full moon when the new moon falls on a Tuesday… Guy #1 and Guy #2 may have nice photos and stats, but both speak in ultimatums and mandates. If we attract what we are and if we become what we think about, I’d like to manifest the gentleman who is simple and joyous.You must spend two hours daily at the gym—like I do. If that’s how they’re writing, then how are they thinking? I’d be lying if I said that a guy who doesn’t go to the gym regularly would be a good match for me, but I offer my preferences in a far-less exclusionary manner. About the Author: Guest Contributor Meet Mindful is the first online dating site to serve the mindful lifestyle.

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